Dear
mom,
This is to make you reconsider some facts you might be
long forgotten. You are the sweetest, selfless, and strongest with
all those beautiful and natural flaws, weaknesses, and
vulnerabilities. I wonder how you were juggling all your personal
matters and your responsibilities like a pro?
I can now
understand how suffocating and overwhelming it is sometimes to wear a
super mom's cape and pretend to be the coolest and high achieving.
Hustles and never-ending demands of household chaos from sleepless
nights, diaper changing, household chores, dinner making, homework
help fix doctor's appointments, errand-running, and many more.
Motherhood is pretty busy.
Have you ever felt the point where
you think you started losing your self and identity while being a
mother? Apparently, no one knows when exactly it happens. But almost
every mom experiences the sense of losing their identity during the
journey of motherhood.
Do you remember the last time you've
had your little 'alone-time,' read a book you've always wanted to,
pushed yourself working hard for that promotion, booked a saloon
appointment, had lunch out with your close friends, took a nap when
you wanted to or meditated? You were expected to consider other
people when deciding and gladly kept all your wants and needs on the
back burner.
Your life is not what it's used to be. You had
long conversations with your colleagues, you loved your professional
life, and you were a social butterfly. It would have been definitely
confusing when you realize things that made your life unique do not
exist anymore. And you wouldn't don't have a clear idea to fix it.
It is wonderful and different to be a mother and experience
motherhood. But with it comes several drastic changes that changed
your priorities and your identity. Losing the sense of who you are
and forget the idea of what you are destined for. Because your whole
life seems to revolve around your kids and their needs and
well-being. It is motherhood that made you selfless, strong, more
patient, caring, forgiving, and responsible. But mom, your life has
got broader meanings to it. Redefine yourself and expect good
changes.
Mom, I know you hardly manage to find time to hit
the pillow, but please stay in touch with your self. Please try
connecting your identity, hobbies, and what you expect from life.
Taking care of yourself is essential, and when I say this, trust me,
mom. Not prioritizing your sleep or physical needs, skipping doctor's
appointments, or ignoring mental health matters. Please do not demote
yourself. Not taking care of yourself in favor of your family's needs
doesn't help anyone in the family.
I want you to set simple,
realistic goals like attending a concert, meeting an old friend,
watching a movie, or even having your alone time, and fulfilling it
by planning and scheduling likewise to motivate your confidence and
happiness in being you, yourself. Every discovery you make about
yourself is essential, and make it in your head that does not let
anything affect your personality.
Rediscovering your identity
can possibly be best done by people who love you and whom you love.
They need you, and you need them in life, so talk to them more often,
share and express your feelings and emotions with them. Let that be
your spouse, your best friend, your cousin, your parents, or anyone
who stays close to your heart. Right people can nourish you from deep
down.
Almost every mom put themselves under the pressure of
being a mom and bury their dreams for the family, and live the rest
of their life unidentifiable to themselves. Ask for help when you
feel like you want it. You deserve all the happiness and peace; your
life should not be in vain or adjustments.
Mom, I know this
life of yours is stressful and crazy, but you love it. You are trying
the best you can. There are emotionally draining moments, and a lot
of emotional strength situations ask for. Remember, you are not
alone! Help, support, and love are always in reach of you. So, ditch
the 'super mom's cape' and let the real you be shown. The real you
wanting help or assistance, your hunger, tiredness, passion, dreams,
vulnerabilities, power, and everything genuinely associated with you
be shown.
-With love
Daughter
*picture credit: freepik.com